My grandmother

My grandmother has been in ill health recently. She was discharged a month ago after we realised that her feet were swollen. However, after the treatment, we felt that she got worst. Worst.. in the sense that she vomits easily. She doesn't like to talk as much and doesnt open her eyelids.

The 1st time I fed her was several weeks ago.. the feeling was intense. Tears well up because I realised that she wasnt the grandma I used to know. You will no longer hear her complain about the food or complain about our house maid. You will no longer see her chat on the phone because she could not place the receiver on her ears. She has been practically spending most of her time on bed. She did not even realised that its going to be Chinese New Year soon. She could not be bothered to order the clothes. All she said is, "I'm tired."

I cried again last evening when I fed her.. because this time, she could not raise up her head. Her explanation - no strength. I know its useless to cry but that was the way i released my sympathy for her. What I can do best now is to spend more time with her.

All along, I wished she could hold on till my wedding... but now... if she cant wait, I will not blame her. Actually it is very selfish of me to ask her to wait because she has to bear with the discomfort and tireness. She no longer asked me when is my wedding but it is ok to me because I will be contented enough if she can drink our (my hubby and my) cup of tea during the tea ceremony.